Wednesday, January 2, 2013

50 Nights of Horror Challenge: Odds and Ends and Severed Limbs to Close Out 2012

50 NIGHTS OF HORROR FINALE WRAP-UP EXTRAVAGANZA!
There were a handful of movies that were recommended to me and I watched after the 50 Nights of Horror Challenge.  There were a couple reviews that I just didn't type up until now.  And there were some that I just put off because of general awfulness.


Salem's Lot (1979)
Format:  Borrowed
Genre:  Vampires

This is a really solid made-for-TV movie that includes some genuine scares.  And that's saying something.  Stephen King wrote the source material.  Tobe Hooper directed it.  You can't really go wrong with that combination.  I can also see how Salem's Lot influenced much of the vampire horror genre.  The floating kid vampires are as scary as hell.  The glowing vampire eyeballs (contact lenses) were super creepy.  I have recently gotten into Guillermo Del Toro's vampire novels, and they read almost as a companion piece to Salem's Lot.  Both are very interesting, engaging vampire horror pieces.

The Innkeepers (2011)
Format:  Netflix Streaming
Genre:  Haunted House

I had been wanting to see this movie for a long, long time.  Most of the reviews I read about the movie, though, called out how slow and unscary it was.  I watched the movie as judiciously as I could with these reviews nagging in the back of my head.  It might have been the fact that I just wanted to like this movie so much, but I didn't find it to be slow.  In fact, like many subtle horror movies, there's a scary ambiance to the film instead of outright cat-jumping-out-of-nowhere scares, and that's perfectly alright with me.  I really enjoyed the movie.  I found myself really rooting for the leading actress.  There were enough low-profile creaks and moans and clues that Kelley and I couldn't put our finger on how this movie was going to end.  And the actual ending?  I couldn't have guessed it EVER.  It really freaked both of us out.  And there were enough unanswered questions from the movie that the creepiness of it sticks in your craw for a while after you've finished the film.  Very well done.

Pieces (1982)
Format:  Borrowed
Genre:  Slasher, Serial Killer

Based on a recommendation from my horror companion Patrick, I watched the film during Hurricane/Super Storm Sandy.  The ambiance of ripping wind and flickering lights set a good mood.  Unfortunately, this movie didn't need much mood.  It's a Spanish-American, dubbed slasher that was pretty sloppy.  It wasn't horrible, but it's also not a movie that's going to creep anybody out or frighten anyone too bad.  There wasn't much to this movie that separates it from any other 70's-80's slasher.  The gore is here.  The boobs are here.  The tired humor and stereotypical bad acting is here.  It's standard slasher fare.
The nugget of info that piqued my interest with this movie was the fact that it is directed by the same man that directed Slugs (one of my favorite movies from the 50 Nights of Horror Challenge).  The screwy ending and the wanton gore are similar, but the humor and grossness of Slugs is not matched in Pieces.

From Beyond (1986)
Format:  Borrowed
Genre:  Lovecraft-ian Monsters

What in the hell did I just see?  This movie made me cringe many, many times.  And I wasn't cringing from outright scares.  I was cringing from gross holy-crap-I-know-these-are-special-effects-but-its-still-going-to-make-me-puke scenes.  Bonus points to the incredible Jeffrey Combs who managed to bug-the-hell-out, act insane, and still seem like a sympathetic character (albeit one whose entire upper torso was temporarily being digested by a demonic worm monster).  The special effects here are really incredible for their time.  Imagine a Fulci movie with a budget.  Well done.  Highly recommended.

Loved Ones (2012)
Format:  DVD
Genre:  Serial Killer, Revenge

Australian horror-stew.  Psycho meets Hostel meets Tarantino-rednecks.  The jury's still out for me on this one.  There were enough twists and turns and "HOLY-SH!T" moments to keep me engaged, but the torture aspect is not one that I enjoy.  This movie seems to be gaining a steady stream of fans and much momentum, so perhaps it's worth watching simply to be ahead of the curve.  To put things in perspective, this is what you're getting yourself into:


Cheerleader Camp (1987)
Format:  DVD
Genre:  Serial Killer

Friday the 13th (minus the tension) mixed with Porky's (minus the sincere humor or likable characters).  Fat guys, butt jokes, and boobs with a smidge of gore.  This movie was alternately named "Bloody Pom Poms." Still don't recommend it.  The movie also features one of the worst ever rap performances on film.  I'm assuming that Run DMC were a relatively new, novel sensation on radio and somehow that fact worked its way in to the film....but instead of leather-clad rap warriors, there are two ultra-Lily-white dudes wearing fake Raybans, singing/rapping off key with little to no enthusiasm.  Imagine someone handing your dad the microphone at karaoke and asking him to do Ice Cube.  It is not meant for public viewing at all.

Halloween 4 (1988)
Format:  Bluray
Genre:  Serial Killer

Completely and entirely forgettable.  In fact, I don't remember a damn thing from this movie, other than blond Mike Myers (seriously) and Dr. Loomis getting beat up in bad-80s-action-fight-style.  And Mike Myers gets blown up in an abandoned mine.  There was much that bugged me about this movie, especially the ending.  Many plot holes.  All around weak execution.

Peeping Tom (1960)
Format:  Borrowed
Genre:  Serial Killer

I had read that this was a solid precursor to Psycho and a must-see.  I saw it and found it too boring.  That's not to say that it was bad.  I was just being fed a steady diet of toss-away thrasher movies, and this one was paced too deliberately.  And it wasn't Alfred Hitchcock by any means.

Manhattan Baby (1982)
Format:  DVD
Genre:  Mummy Curse!

Seriously.  Don't waste your time.  There's the typical Italian eyeball violence here, but the story is so loosely assembled, poorly explained, and flat that there's nothing creepy about this at all.  The special effects are uncharacteristically bad for even a Fulci film (when birds attack, you can clearly see their strings and sticks that make them "fly").  The use of dubbing is tired at this point.  I can only imagine that someone told Fulci that they would only produce the movie if he at least loosely tied it to something vaguely similar to The Exorcist.  And in this film, a girl becomes possessed by an evil...Egyptian amulet...until it is...exorcised.  The movie was also released as The Evil Eye, The Possessed, and Eye of the Evil Dead.  I don't recommend it unless you're a Fulci completionist.

And that's it.  I might add more horror reviews throughout 2013.  I talked with Kelley, and we both agree that I could have been doing many different, more productive things this past fall instead of filling all of my free time with horror stuff.  I think it was fun.  My favorite find was Slugs, and my sister bought that for me for Christmas.  I also found a load of horror VHS tapes at a flea market close to my parents' house.  So I have plenty of material lined up if I want to do this again in the fall of 2013.  For now, though, I'm going to take some time off from it all.  I hope these reviews will be useful to somebody someday.  As a deterrent.  A guide.  However.


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